Some Nights

Some nights
I feel like crying.
And others,
Dying.
But one thing's for sure:
No matter the issue,
My love for you is pure.

Some nights
I want to run away.
Some nights
I think you're gonna stray.
Some nights
I wish you wouldn't fight
But I yearn to hear your voice
Every single night.

Through thick and thin
I manage to somehow grin,
As you recount the ways
You love me so.

Some nights
I question your love,
Sometimes doubting
If you were sent from up above.
For better or worse,
Despite the depressing downs
And short-lived ups,
You're the one I desire
At the end of every night.

Millie J. Skosher

Cut Your Losses

Cut your losses.
Quick!
Do it now,
While it's still fresh.
The longer you wait,
The more danger she'll be in
When you actually do.
With you,
It'll hurt 50x more
Than with anyone else.
She's used to people
Coming in and out
Of her life,
But no one
Has ever returned.
That makes you special
Yet much more deadly.
You could mean
The end to her,
To her sanity,
To even her life!
That is,
If you choose
To wait
Until it's too late
To cut your losses
And run.

Millie J. Skosher

Power

Who controls
The Sun
In the Sky?

Who controls
The Moon,
The Stars,
The Sea?
Is it You?
Me?
We?
Us?

No,
It's no one.
You see,
The waves,
Clash onto the shore,
Like nobody's business.
It doesn't apologize
If someone's feet
Gets wet.
It carries on,
Without a care in the world.

The sun,
It shines, rises and sets,
On its own time.
The sun waits
For no one.

The stars,
They do as they please,
Sometimes dancing across
The night sky.
Other times, simply not appearing
With the sky left
As a pitiful abyss.
No matter how hard one wishes or prays,
I simply do not have the power
To make this stubborn world
Go round.

You were supposed to improve
My sick view of the
world, but you failed me.
You failed to be
The light at the end of my tunnel.
So now I've crashed
Into something in this darkness.
Without any light to see,
I can't address my injuries.
I can't call for help,
For help is nowhere to be seen.
I guess I'll just lie here and bleed.
Bleed and bleed until I can't feel anymore.
Only then, you'll wish you had the power.

Millie J. Skosher

2 A.M.

2 am
As I feel my heart breaking
Because it yearns for the you
That is no more.
2 am
My eyes water,
Threatening to overflow
 The lids that hold them there.
2 am
My mind pounds
As the thoughts of insecurity
Run wild within me.
What more could I do
To prove to you
That I'm susceptible to your words,
Defenseless to the bullets you call jokes.
You chide me for being "so sensitive".
Why can't you see
How your words mean a lot to me?
Sticks and stones, right?
Oh how very wrong,
For words will always hurt me,
Especially yours.

Millie J. Skosher

Addicted

Without meaning to,
It seems I've become an addict;
Always craving another's company
Aside from my own.

There are times
Where I prefer solitude
Over the magnitude of a crowd.
But deep down inside
Where I'm covering behind a wall,
I desire to be around someone,
Anyone
That will make my fears
Disappear.

I've only ever wanted
To be good enough
Regardless of my flaws,
Insecurities, and other stuff.

All this time
I've been trying to stay strong
Despite all the people that purposely
Treat me wrong.

You couldn't tell, you couldn't see
What truly is wrong with me.
I hide it all behind a smile
Only because I'd hate to make you
Frown.

I'm an addict.
A druggie.
Consumed
By the way You
Make me feel.

Millie J. Skosher

Day by Day

Day by Day

I love to say

Just how much

I adore You.

Your smile,

Your laugh,

It makes me glad

That I'm the one

You want.

Day by Day

I hear You say

That You will never leave me

Even after all my teasing.

My eyes,

My hair,

At which You stare

Because it simply

Allures you.

Day by Day

You lead astray

All the pain

Inside Me.

Time with You,

My heart renews

As my Love

Grows for You.

Thank You,

Kinglsy,

For choosing to

Go through this

Here with me.

Millie J. Skosher

Mind Dump #1

I feel like the world is conspiring against me. It's like every time I make good progress for myself, something happens to keep me from progressing, something I cannot control. Why? What have I done to not receive happiness? I've always wanted the best for people, can I not receive the same in return? Am I truly a bad person to want to be selfish sometimes, to actually care about myself? So far, I've spent majority of my life caring about everyone else and not myself. I've always treated everyone with respect. I've always provided for people when I could. I was always there for them. But what do I get in return? Absolutely nothing. And those few who actually were there for me, guess where they are now. They're gone, no longer within my reach, or not least not in my reach to make a difference. The people I've allowed to get close to me, to love me, and I love in return, has left; whether it was of their own will or something they could not control. My life is full of nothing but sacrifices, very rarely do I receive anything, because when I do, they're stripped away from me, leaving me all alone. I never let my pain show. No one cared in the first place, so why should they now? After all of this, I just truly need ONE person who will stay with me to The End and After. I don't need temporary friends, I have enough of those already, they're called Classmates. Maybe I'm just meant to travel through this journey of Life alone. Maybe that's what it is, because so far, that's how it seems. What a world we live in, where the Good is Punished and the Bad is Rewarded to the Highest Degree.

Taelor J. Ferguson

Tell Me How.

How?
How does one
Readjust to a place
Where She feels
As though She
Does not belong?

She smiles.
She laughs.
She sings.
She dances.
She is full of hope.
She wishes.

Then Boom.
She hurts.
She cries.
She wants.
She needs.
She breaks.
She bleeds.
She's lost.

In a matter
Of minutes,
Hours, Days,
Weeks, Months,
Her World
Flips Upside Down.
She has to start over
From scratch,
And repair Herself
Just to survive;
Only to be Forced
To start over
Again.

All She ever wanted
Was to be wanted,
To be needed,
To smile,
To laugh,
To sing,
To dance,
To wish,
To be happy,
To be Herself.

Millie J. Skosher

The End.

Every second,
Every minute,
Every hour,
Every day,
Every week
That goes by,
I feel myself slipping
Away from your side.

I promised I'd stay,
But my mind,
A complete disarray,
Is working otherwise.
There's no doubt,
I'll still love you,
But things between us,
You can no longer do.

As weeks go by,
I feel the distance grow,
Not only in my heart,
But also in your show.
You shut me out,
Won't let me in.
How can I
Just continue to pretend?

There's no more us,
No more We.
It's taken a while,
But now I see..
This is the End
Of You and Me.

Dedicated to Him..

Millie J. Skosher

I didn't mean to..

I didn't mean
To become
A distraction.

I wasn't trying
To get in the way.
I thought that
We could be
Friends
Of some sort..

No harsh feelings,
But I hope,
In time,
We can be
Friends
Again...

Please,
Forgive me
For being
Your distraction.
I didn't mean to...

Millie J. Skosher

Your Voice

Your voice is my drug,
Stop and try to listen
As I lay here
And think:
"Boy what have you done to me?"
Not a hint of jealousy
Unless it's from those
Sweating me
But boy I wonder
Do you see
Just what all you do to me.
Making up these fantasies
About you here
Right next to me
Helping me with all these pains,
Trying to make them go away.
Promise me that you'll stay
And there'll be no one in our way.

Don't you see what you have done
Because your voice,
My mind, it's won.

Millie J. Skosher

Going Ghost

I should be used

To feeling this way, 

But I can't help it

When it's with you. 

You

Were supposed to be different, 

To be a new experience,

But you're shaping up

Like the rest. 

Deserted

In a time

Of need, 

Distracted 

By the smell

Of green, 

I can't help

But feel alone. 

Going Ghost

On the ones

We love the most.

No need to boast,

I know you need

Your daily toast. 

Just for note,

I wouldn't have

Been a Ghost..

Millie J. Skosher

Don't Be A Memory

My heart
Beats out my chest.
Tears
Running down
My face.
Things have changed,
And I don't know why.
I haven't lied
So tell me why
Do I feel this way?

I should have warned you
How attached I can get,
How much that I feel,
How needy I can be.
I apologize for being me.

Please,
You mean so much
In just a short amount
Of time.

Your voice,
It's changed.
You really don't
Sound the same.
Is it me,
Or is it you?
Is there anything
That I can do?
I cannot bear
The thought of losing you.
I'll do anything
To make it up to you.
Please,
Don't be
Another memory..

Millie J. Skosher

Polar Opposites

You and I

Have reached that point

Of no return. 

We've progressed 

Into Polar Opposites

Of one another. 

You say right,

I Say left.

I say go, 

You say stop. 

You see green, 

I see red. 

I say up, 

You say down. 

I feel light, 

You feel dark. 

There is

No inbetween

Anymore. 

I have ran

Out of straws

To call
As the last.

How
Can You say
That you trust me
When you accuse me
Left and Right?

I never asked
For any of this.
All I wanted
Was True Happiness.
Yet it seems as though
I won't find it
Here with You
As my Polar Opposite.

Millie J. Skosher 

Would You?

Would You care
If I hung up
And never called back?

Would You care
If I never replied
To any of your message?

Would You care
If something bad
Happened to me?

Would You care
If I drowned
In my worsening depression?

Would You care
If I moved
Across the country
To avoid thoughts,
And memories
Of  You?

Would You care
If I ran
Away from home?

Would You care
If I started doing drugs
To ease the pain?

Would You care
If I cried all night?

Would You care
If I took my own life?

Would You care?

Would You...

Millie J. Skosher

As Days Progress

As days progress,
It's become quite clear.
It was lovely,
While it lasted;
But there's no place
For me
In your life.

You're going down one path,
And I on another.
Your voice,
As you say
"Don't Forget About Me..."
Echoes in my head
As days progress.

You've become
A great friend,
And I'd hate
To force myself
Into your life.
I thought
You would
Be able to
Make these thoughts,
And feelings,
Go away.
But even your warm smile,
Can't make my emptiness,
Whole.

Millie Skosher

The Kind of Friend I Am

How can I

Expect either of You

To do

As I would

For You?

I sit here

Feeling BETRAYED

by the Both of You.

I would never

Have done such a thing

That You

Have done to Me.

I respect

Your Privacy,

Your Emotions,

Your Private Thoughts.

Can't the same be done

For Me?

Hahaha,

Oh, It was only a JOKE!

Take it easy Tae,

We were only PLAYING.

I would never

Make you feel

The way I do

Now.

Some friends you are..

Where were you

When I needed a friend?

When I felt alone and abandoned?

When I thought you deserted me?

I guess

It is just

The kind of friend I am,

To hold you

To a higher standard,

Than the rest.

I guess

It was just

Stupid of me,

To think

That I could count

On you,

Instead of my own boyfriend.

But I guess,

That's just

The kind of friend

I am.

Millie J. Skosher

A Moment

A moment
With you
Could change everything
For me.

A moment
With you,
My unspoken desire,
Is all I truly want.
Just one moment
Is all I need
To get me
Through this year.

One moment,
Spent long or short,
Will answer so many questions
And silence my doubts.

In just one moment,
I am yours,
Forever
And Always.

Millie J. Skosher

Constantly

Constantly.

One thing,

After another.

Not once, can we

Have a moment

To ourselves. 

Trouble finds you,

One way or another. 

Constantly, 

Something, 

Or someone,

Pops up

To tear us apart.

If it's not one thing,

It's another.

When it's nothing

With me,

It's something with you.

Is it true,

That I'm not meant

To have you?

Constantly,

I think about us.

Constantly, 

I worry about us.

Constantly, 

I cry over you.

Constantly, 

I wish it wasn't true.

All I ever wanted,

was to be happy with you.

But I can't even have that,

Or a simple kiss from you.

Constantly, 

This feels like goodbye.

And with these words,

Tears fill my eyes.

Constantly,

I wish for you.

Constantly, 

I wish to run away

With

You.

Millie J. Skosher

Thoughts for Tonight..

I've always said,
"Oh if I was an only child.."
But after today,
I wouldn't want to be.
Not with this woman
I'm obligated to call
'Mom'.

What has she done,
Besides give me life,
For me?
She certainly hasn't been there
Whenever I needed her.
All she cares about is her appearance.
Not about me.
Shoot, she cares about my brother more than me and I'm her first born.
Most times I wish I was alone with nothing to worry about except myself.
If I could disappear, I would..

Millie J. Skosher